{25 days of hotness} day twenty two

{25 days of hotness}

day twenty two

JARRAD HOEATA
*Highlanders, Taranaki, Maori All Blacks*

ITM Cup hotty of the week

Jarrad Hoeata!

age:  29

position:  lock, flanker, #8

teams:  Taranaki, Highlanders, Maori All Blacks

Who would make a 1st XV of NZ rugby hotness?

Over the next couple of months there will be ample opportunity for myself and other Kiwi rugby fans to predict who will make the All Blacks squad for the June tests against France.

Of course Zac Guildford & Dan Carter
would feature in such a team!

No doubt there will be many opposing views regarding the criteria for making the squad – namely should current form win out over past form. Will Steve Hansen and his merry men again pick players who didn't stand out in the Super XV, but have proven themselves in previous seasons in the black jersey? Will those who have truly impressed at Super XV level this year miss out in favour of the 'tried and true who haven't really performed, but probably will in the black jersey'?

It is my opinion that Steve Hansen and Co. need to think ahead to the 2015 Rugby World Cup, and start giving young players who are playing phenomenally the chance to get experience in the coveted All Blacks jersey. It is a fact that of the 2012 All Blacks, 8 were aged 30 or over, and while it's great to think these guys could all still be performing at their peak in 18 months time, the fact of the matter is that with age, performance declines, players are more susceptible to injury and being presented with

Every team needs a little mongrel... and Jarrad Hoeata
is the most mongrel-ific player in NZ rugby right now!

European and Japanese contracts worth hundreds of thousands of dollars is understandably enticing. No player's future through to RWC 2015 is certain, but it has to be least certain for the more 'senior' members of the team.

A prime example of choosing past form over current form comes in the shape of Piri Weepu. He was selected for the All Blacks in 2012, much to the shock of even his most devoted fans. His Super XV performance had been lacklustre, particularly with comparison to the man who missed out because of Piri – Andy Ellis. In all, Piri Weepu had two or three starts last year, and generally came off the bench with about 20

He may be a little on the young side, but
Sam Cane holds a lot of potential....

minutes to go. In all but one game he made little to no impact in his few minutes on the field, and as the season progressed one really had to wonder exactly what Steve Hansen could see in Piri, that no one else could. I won't go into the real reason I believe Piri made the squad. That is between Steve & Piri...

It is understandable that the All Blacks selectors want to pick sides who can win – but no team can win all of the time, and maybe it's worth sacrificing a win or two in order to start giving the developing players experience in the All Black jersey. In 2012 Steve and co. DID get some new blood into the team – the likes of Aaron Smith and Julian Savea proving that the young fellas have what it takes to compete at international level. In the case of Aaron Smith he went from being a general unknown to the choice #9 for the All Blacks, in place of Piri Weepu. Tawera Kerr-Barlow then went on to become the second choice #9. Behind Aaron Smith. Ahead of Piri Weepu. You know – 'full of past experience' Piri Weepu.

Straight men can probably skip the following...

Not your stereotypical hotty, but like it or not,
Matt Todd IS hot!

One thing that IS a certainty however, is that New Zealand rugby is ALWAYS going to be full of quality eye candy. Whether you like the clean cut look or the more rugged look, it is a dead cert that within NZ rugby, you will find a large list of candidates to perve on each weekend. I am sure that all the women who visit Pink Rugby, firstly do so because they purely enjoy the game of rugby... but I am just as sure that for a large majority, the appeal isn't purely... pure!

It is with this thought... nay, FACT, in mind, that I give you my first official NZ 1^st XV (& the requisite 7 reserves). As with all team predictions, the choices are very much subjective, but I'm sure that you will all agree with at least one player on the McBonbon 1^st XV. Seeing as it is rather hard [for me personally] to find a hot 1, 2 or 3, I have opted to choose the 22 hottest players, regardless of their onfield position.

The McBonbon 1^st XV

(in no particular order.... for the most part)

1. Zac Guildford (Crusaders)
2. Richie McCaw (Crusaders)
3. Matt Todd (Crusaders)
4. Jarrad Hoeata (Highlanders)
5. Phil Burleigh (Highlanders)
6. Daniel Carter (Crusaders)
7. Liam Messam (Chiefs)
8. Shaun Treeby (Highlanders)
9. Ryan Crotty (Crusaders)
10. Tamati Ellison (Highlanders)
11. Israel Dagg (Crusaders)
12. TJ Perenara (Hurricanes)
13. Cory Jane (Hurricanes)
14. Kade Poki (Highlanders)
15. Richard Kahui (Chiefs)
16. Sam Cane (Chiefs)
17. Andre Taylor (Hurricanes)
18. Dominic Bird (Crusaders)
19. Andy Ellis (Crusaders)
20. Ali Williams (Blues)
21. Codie Taylor (Crusaders)
22. Sam Whitelock (Crusaders)

Highlanders.... *shakes head*

(also published on Pink Rugby)

When it was announced that the Highlanders had the services of Tony Woodcock, Ma'a Nonu and

I too would be bowing my head in shame

Brad Thorn for the 2013 Super Rugby season, it seemed the Highlanders would have a very competitive team. Between them, the three new signings have 231 All Blacks caps, and 305 Super Rugby caps – when added to the likes of Andrew Hore, it seemed the Highlanders would have a very magical team for 2013. Definitely the team to watch!

Some very impressive pairings automatically came to mind – Hore and Woodcock in the front row, Thorn and Jarrad Hoeata together in the locking department, then in the backs Aaron Smith feeding the ball to Ma'a Nonu, Tamati Ellison, Hosea Gear and Ben Smith. Ten players with All Black & Maori All Blacks experience, it seemed like a no brainer. As an ex-Highlanders supporter I must admit that I

Elliot Dixon
... tats AND the man can play!

perience to the team. While I'm sure their knowledge and experience has been beneficial to the other players on the team, it seems that the Highlanders have become almost a 'retirement home' for players. Rather than playing with the energy and vitality of younger players, all these new, experienced signings seem to be making little impact at all on the team, almost as if they'd be happier sitting down to a game of BINGO or crib, while sipping on a sherry.

When you look at numbers (as I regularly do, having a fetish for rugby statistics), on paper the Highlanders have the oldest average age, at 25.7 years, followed by the Hurricanes on 25.1, the Chiefs on 24.8, the Blues on 24.0 and the Crusaders on 23.7. When analysed even further – focusing solely on forward packs, the Highlanders again have the oldest age average, at 27.9 years, with the four other teams averaging between 25.1 and 25.9 years. These averages make it clear that while age can often mean experience – it doesn't always translate into success.

As we enter round nine, it seems that the Highlanders coaches are shaking things up to try and get

One can watch the Highlanders lose....
and perve at Phil Burleigh....

that elusive first win of the season – All Blacks Aaron Smith and Colin Slade have been dropped, in favour of some lesser-known names. I personally think this is a good thing – because it HAS been all the 'lesser' knowns from the team, who are performing well this year. The likes of Elliot Dixon, Phil Burleigh (who also has the added benefit of being some major eye candy!) and Kade Poki have been playing exceptionally well. I think it's time for the coaches to stop waiting for the bigger names (namely any player who has worn the black jersey in the last 24 months) to finally step up, and for them to instead give the lesser-knowns a chance to prove their worth.

Jarrad Hoeata.
Just cos he's hot.
Unlike the Highlanders.

While I'm at it, perhaps the Highlanders lack of success is all down to the 'Nonu Curse'. Think about it it. 2011 – Hurricanes play badly. With Nonu. 2012 – Blues play badly. With Nonu. 2013 – Highlanders are playing badly. With Nonu. Yes, perhaps it's unfair to suggest, but I guarantee you it is a thought that every Kiwi rugby fan has had over the past couple of weeks. I would go as far as to say that the 'Landers will secure their first win without Nonu on the field.

OF COURSE it's not all bad. If the Super XV was a sexy-man competition, the Highlanders would be sitting in the top four, especially when Tamati Ellison comes back from injury in the next couple of weeks.

25 Days of Rugby Man Hotness (Dec 21)

Bestill my beating heart...

Jarrad Hoeata!
... we call him 'Hottyata' for a reason!

EOYT Squad. God I'm Good. & WTF Steve?

The All Blacks squad for the end of year tour was announced yesterday, and for the most part the selections were obvious.  BUT (yes - there is always a but), there are a couple of admissions and exclusions which puzzle the hell out of me, and make me wonder exactly what is Steve thinking?

See ya later, Piri.

The first, and potentially the most obvious admission - Piri Weepu.  WTF STEVE?  I understand that Piri has the potential to be bloody awesome on the field, I mean, the guy developed quite the cult following during the Rugby World Cup, he really was on fire.  But this year, it seems that Piri has been coated in flame retardant.  There has been no sign of that fire, hell - there aren't even a few embers lying around.  No.  In 2012, Piri is more like saturated firewood - without a match in sight.  Or should that be a match start?

The kid Piri mentored has surpassed him. Oops.

I think that all that is really saving Piri's ass here, is the fact he is another goal kicking option - but with Beauden Barrett improving with each game, and the skill of Aaron Cruden, and of course Dan Carter, I don't think this little saving grace is going to be saving his ass much longer.  Especially not when there is another #9 nipping at his heels.  A number #9 he helped to mentor whilst playing with the Hurricanes.  Yeap - TJ Perenara, who is finally on his way back from inury, after breaking his ankle in a[n unofficial] Super XV match against the Reds (?) this season.  TJ outplayed Piri in all aspects of the game during the 2012 Super XV, and other than Aaron Smith, he was the most exciting #9 playing in the Super XV - and I have a feeling that had he not been injured, he quite possibly could have been in this end of year tour squad, or at the very least, been in the Maori All Blacks tour squad.  Then there is Tawera Kerr-Barlow, who also outplayed Piri this season - but more on him later.

Long story short?  Don't expect to see Piri in the black jersey, in 2013!

Yeap, I'd be feeling that way too, Ali

The other curious admission is Ali Williams.  I scratch my head and try to come up with reasons he was selected, after playing bugger all rugby this year - and I fail to come up with any reasons, other than the fact he's played 50+ tests for the All Black, and could be seen as a good leader for other locks selected (Sam Whitelock, Brodie Rettalick, Luke Romano) - even if judging by that list, he would be the 4th favoured lock on the list.  Maybe Steve has more faith in him than the NZ public (and it seems, a lot of the rugby fraternity), but I don't understand how he is in the team.  Surely Jarrad Hoeata could have been given a look in, particularly with his ability to play other positions in the forwards, as well.  Then there is Craig Clarke, who had an excellent Super XV season for the Chiefs?  I highly doubt that Ali Williams will make it to the end of the end of year tour, uninjured - and the way Clarke, Hoeata & Jason Eaton have been playing, it will probably signal the end of his time in the black jersey.

Dane Coles - the dude can run.

It's not all doom and gloom and bitching though!  I let out a little squeeeee of delight, when I saw that Tawera Kerr-Barlow and Dane Coles had been named in the squad - both are players I noticed early in the Super XV season, and I remember saying on several occasions that both of them would be All Blacks by the end of the year.  Well - it's not quite the end of the year, and they are now named in the All Blacks squad, and one has to imagine that both will get some game time in Europe.  I am especially glad that Dane Coles got in, because while we seem to have an abundance of talent when it comes to the backs, and most of the forwards positions, hooker is one where we are lacking.   Dane Coles did a great job for the Hurricanes, showing he could do the physical work of a hooker - but that he could also run... and I think it's a great idea to get him in the squad while the likes of Keven Mealamu and Andrew Hore are still around to mentor him, to help boost his confidence and skill, so that when the time comes for those players to retire, we won't be let with a big gaping hole, in the hooking department.

Tawera Kerr-Barlow, more in form than Piri, in 2012

And yes, I understand that I just mentioned 'gaping holes' when discussing hookers.

All in all, a pretty awesome squad to take on Scotland, Italy, Wales and England - with the possibility for one of these games to be a swan song for two or three of the players, but also the possibility for a lot of young up and comers to really stamp their mark on the team.